Cover credits: Photo, retouch: www.schickpics.de, Dreads: Janas Rastazauber, Hairclip: Frolleinkram
Ashtrayheart is a very talented model from Germany with amazing work done showing that different can mean beautiful, she is also giving her 1st steps in photography were she reveals one more amazing talent.
1. How would you describe yourself?
I see myself as a goofy and visceral person. Sometimes i feel like i have two sides, cause i am actually a very serious and realistic person but at the same time i am such a dreamer! I love being by myself but i cant stand being alone. Being quiet is charactaristic but sometimes i am the loudest and most annoying one at a party. Well, mostly i am very tender, as long as you don’t mess with me 😉
2. How did you start modeling?
First i just wanted some nice pictures of myself, so i signed in to a modeling-index. I got to know some nice (and some not so nice) photographers and i very soon i found out that modeling can be very creative and fun, so i started to use it for making some ideas come true. Now i just do what i love, do my own ideas, create outfits, sets and shootings to express myself.
3. Your dared to be different and yet amazing was that an easy choice, did you get your friends support?
Yes! My friends are honest and i would never stay with people who don’t like me the way i am… well who would? Sometimes its hard to tell why i look like that and why i did certain things, because its so normal to me. But i am normal to my friends too!
4. You have many different make up , hair and clothing styles do you do them yourself ?
Usually i do everything by myself! I plan the outfit and matching hair and make up. Sometimes i just do everything affect based and mood depending if i do some spontaneous shots.
There is only one MUA i love to work with: Alice bizarre. She is just amazing and she does a lot of crazy things and she’s got her own style, that i love! I was lucky to work with her two times!
5. As a model you have been published several times how does that make you feel?
Wicked! I feel very honored every time but its still weird for me cause i just feel like a normal girl who takes a few pictures every now and then. Still i am very happy that there are people out there who like what i do and appreciate that!
6. I know you are not just a model you enjoy to be behind the camera also, how did your work as a photographer start?
It started when i had a lot of free time after a foot-surgery. I had to stay at home for 2 long months. So i thought why not finally do it? I always thought i don’t have enough time, no money to get a good camera, but when i couldn’t go out i didn’t spend money so i bought a good camera, asked my friend for some technical advise and then just started taking pictures. It felt very good to finally work as a photographer too, cause i always had that on my mind. And now its as much fun as modeling myself.
7. As a Photographer How is it working with other models, do you think that being a model yourself helps?
Of course! Its so good to know both sides! The models feel very comfortable cause i know how they feel. I give them enough time to pose, i can see when they get cold, or when they have something on their minds. If i work with non-professional models, i can give them tips for posing and facial expression. And i know whats important for them, how they wanna look like and how the picture should look like. Most important is to have fun and feel comfortable!
8. You have amazing pictures as a model and as a photographer also were do you get your inspiration from?
My mood, my emotions and music. Music can change my mood so fast, i love that! Everything that happens to me is inspirational. My pictures are an optical diary. But sometimes i just want to be a fairy or so 😀 hahaha And my models always bring fantastic ideas and outfits so we create something out of their ideas.
9. Whats the story behind the name Ashtrayheart ?
When i was 14 years old i signed in to gothic-chat-site and i had to choose a nickname. I was deeply in love with someone who didn’t love me and i felt very hurt ( haha yeah puperty) and i knew that the band ‘Placebo’ where called Ashtrayheart before they changed their name into ‘Placebo’. I loved the meaning of that hurt and tortured heart cause it matched mine. So the name was mine. Also i like the both sides of that name: ‘Ashtray’ is something dark, dirty disliked something nobody wants to stay. And ‘heart’ is just the most important thing in life everybody needs and couldn’t live without. A perfect match of opposites.
10. Your still young and i’m sure you have many plans for the future so what would it be your biggest goal in life?
That’s actually a simple but tough question. I wanna stay happy. There are a lot of goals like travelling the world, meet Placebo and tell them their music saved my life, built up an animal sanctuary, bring peace and happiness to the world.. but most of all i wanna be happy.
11. Well to end you know you have many fans out there (me included) and you even are an inspiration to some , so what would you like to say to them?
Omg soooooo freaking much! I don’t know how to write down all of it! Well here are some things:
- Be yourself
- Listen to your heart
- Don’t stay with people who don’t make you happy
- Stay with the people who make you happy
- Spend all your money
- Be honest, to yourself, to others
- Don’t let people convince you to be ordinary
- You are amazing
- Kiss a pig’s nose
- Don’t take drugs
- Do it